Happy New Year From A Grateful Recovering Stuffer!

Maybe you are wondering what I mean when I call myself a “stuffer”. 

Let me give a little background.  In my wellness journey, I have realized just how much my emotions - and how I handle those emotions - have played into my weight over the years.  I can tell you how many calories are in any food, I can tell you how many calories I burn exercising, I know about nutrient density, low fat, no carb, paleo, vegan…I know it all. 

But there was still something sabotaging me.

I have finally had to come to terms with how much I eat to soothe, to deal and to ignore.  And, in retrospect, it has been going on a long time.  Probably as far back as many of my early memories go.

Once I realized what was going on wasn’t just a character flaw, I had to figure out what mechanism(s) were triggering me exactly.   I know stress is a big one for me, but also nerves, feelings of self-doubt or plain old feeling overwhelmed will also trigger me.  Once I had identified those hot buttons, I have had to work to unravel their power instead of packing the offending emotions away in a neat little box and “stuffing” them down with whatever large quantity of food was on hand, junk or otherwise.

This has been a scary project!

I’m generally very even in my temperament and moods.  I was worried that my status quo would get way to out of balance if I allowed myself to feel and process.  And to be honest, it has, but not in the way I had imagined.

I have had to learn how to stop and ask myself why I want to eat that entire plate, box or whatever.  What is really going on?  I have had to learn to be quiet for a few minutes, to tune in, and to meditate at times.  I have had to learn how to really be open to people, to ask for help, and ask questions to seek understanding instead of just trying to control outcomes.  I have had to try and not control in general (this was a big one for the high planner that I am).  I had to be willing to go with the flow more and worry less.  And, I learned I needed to shift my perspective sometimes.  View lots of demand from family, clients, and work as an opportunity to serve others rather than feeling like I had too many demands being placed on me.  (This step has been HUGE!)

Yes, I am still a recovering stuffer, meaning that I acknowledge I still have so far to go on this path. And yes, I still protect my voice, my personality, my boundaries, but I hope to continue to do this in this new improved way as we go into this new year. 

May your New Year bring you peace and prosperity! Happy New Year!


10 comments

  • I hear ya. I’ve always been that way, but having just gone thru a divorce and finding myself learning to be a single Mom of 2 young boys it’s in overdrive. My weight is skyrocketing while my self esteem is plummeting. I’m finally learning I need to on that before I can get this weight off the right way (or as I do it).

    Tara H.
  • I just started my own healthy journey and I really relate to this. The urge to stuff seems overhwleming. Sometimes I cry trying to fight the urge. The cravings are intense. I would live some advice on how to deal with this.

    Angela Mercer
  • I’m so very happy to finally see a real plus sized woman doing this. I love following you. I’m not a “stuffer” per se but I do love my sugar treats. I have quite a bit to lose and am 6 months shy of the big 50. We can do this

    Kelly
  • I think you just described my life!! Hopefully this year my journey to heal and grow will lead me to a place that makes these things no longer necessary in my world! Thank you for sharing this.

    Renee
  • Wonderfully written and expressed! I totally relate to being a “stuffer.” I stuff because I’m happy, sad, bored, stressed, etc. Having a name for it will help me be mindful of what I’m doing when I’m doing it! Thank you!

    Jackie

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